


Dear Dan

by that_one_waffle



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Feels, Implied Death, Implied Relationships, Letter, M/M, Sadness, basically implied everything, literally nothing but feels, not gonna lie
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-14
Updated: 2016-10-14
Packaged: 2018-08-22 10:20:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8282416
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/that_one_waffle/pseuds/that_one_waffle
Summary: "Hey... Hey Bear..? 
Do you remember 2022?"





	

**Author's Note:**

> Trigger warning??? 
> 
> There's implied death in here, but since it's implied, it's not clearly stated it's suicide or if they're dying of natural causes. The details regarding the death are completely up to you.

"Dear Dan,

It's been a while, hasn't it? It feels like only just yesterday, we were sitting in our living room, watching that new anime that you were so excited about. Things like that sometimes make a smile pop up onto my face, but other times, they just make me miss you more...

Do you remember when I first met you? I was so nervous! We'd been skyping for a while, of course, and I was the one that suggested it, but the closer that moment came, the more nervous and excited I became. I'm sure you were pretty nervous as well, despite what you might've said.

I remember 2009. Things were... they were different back then. We were different. We were more... carefree. I mean, I guess you're allowed to be with a new friend. But this was different. You were more open with how you felt. I was as well, but I didn't really show it- not to you, at least.

Sometimes I wonder, did I really think of you as a friend back then? Or...

Oh well.

2012\. I think you of all people would definitely remember 2012. You were scared- I know you were. And I wanted to be there for you, but when you shut everyone out, you shut me out with them, and that's a whole year of time I could've properly spent with you by your side, now down the drain, wasted. Time I'll never get back. Nor you, I suppose.

After that, nothing much really happened. We were just youtubers. We lived our lives and just had fun.

But then came 2014. No one really talks about that year as much, but you did. That was when we started doing all that secretive stuff. That's the year we stayed up late in our office and just wrote and wrote and wrote. We did videos, and we wrote. We ate, and wrote. We watched tv, then wrote. So much writing in just one year! I don't know how either of us survived.

But we did, and when 2015 came around, we were ready to tell the world. The app, the book. The tour! It was so exciting! And so was 2016.

That's... that's one of my many favourite memories together, Dan.

Standing on that stage together, just being ourselves. Honestly, it's not even a stretch for me to microwave my laptop. But looking back on it now, as I write this, I find it... soured. If only slightly.

Cause you see, nothing's ever been the same. I've lost track of the days, the months. How could I think of those things when you're not here?

How could I think of the date, when I could look at the month and remember something about it that reminds me of you? How could I even think of the cereal in the kitchen if you're not here to catch me stealing some? How could I think of absolutely anything when I've spent most of my happy life with you by my side? How, Dan?

I can't. I thought I could, I thought that I would be fine without you, albeit pretty sad. But I'm not. I'm not okay.

But it's going to be alright, Dan. It's going to be alright.

Cause it won't be long now until I'll be by your side once more. It'll be just like old times- we can play I spy. Doesn't that sound fun...?

Hey... Hey, Bear?

Do you remember 2022...? Because I really do.

I hope you have sharpies with you, Dan, cause we're going to need them.

Love, your best buddy,   
Phil Lester" 


End file.
